The Genuine Power in Asking the Right Question

I ask a lot of questions. A LOT. At least my family seems to think so.

My curious mind has led me to understand how to live in more peace, harmony, and joy than any other time in my life. And I’m grateful.

Part of the reason for that has been understanding of the power of questions. Specifically, how to shift the focus of my internal questions from what I don’t want, to what I do.

Let me explain…

In years past my questions would be typically focused on understanding why I’d done something, hadn’t done it, or why life wasn’t happening according to my plan. The dialogue in my head on any given day could sound something like:

“How could I be that stupid?”

“What was I thinking?”

“Why doesn’t anything ever work out for me?”

“Why did I think he/she/they would do the right thing?”

“Why can’t I ever get this right?”

Everything changed when I started asking different questions.

Many years ago, as my exhausted sister and I sat in a hospital waiting room watching the door for the doctor to appear and give us an update on our critically ill father, a new question came to me. At this point, Dad had been hospitalized or in a nursing home for over a year with no end in sight. We were drained and out of judgements, accusations, fear, and self-pity when I heard a new question arise.

“What does love look like here and how does love move me forward?”

The question didn’t come from me. It came through me. And I immediately felt a dramatic difference. Many of my previous questions made me feel constricted, small, weak, and alone.

This was different.

Observing the love in every situation and then asking love to guide me forward shifted…everything. I was mentally clearer, more aware, and awake. Physically I felt more expansive, more relaxed, and less triggered. Spiritually I not only felt more connected to God, but to my family, my dad and everyone taking care of him.

Now I remind myself to stay in the positive when I ask questions. These days my questions are typically more like:

“How can I be even more happy today?”

“Who could I surprise with a text, note or call?”

“What’s the next best step for my business?”

“How can I best serve this client today?”

“What would be my healthiest food option right now?”

“How can I be more loving to myself and others?”

Note how these questions make you feel. That’s the genuine power in asking the right question.


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